‘Turtle Power’ vs. ‘Ninja Rap’

TMNT Rap Song Poll Results

In last month’s poll I asked which cheesy TMNT rap song is superior: “Turtle Power” by Partners in Kryme, or “Ninja Rap” by Vanilla Ice.

Here’s what you said:

  • 78% stand for what you believe in and find the strength to do what’s right
  • 22% would rather rock & roll the place with the power of the Ninja Turtle bass

Winner: Turtle Power!

Even though it has stupid lyrics and falsely claims Raphael is the leader, I’ve always maintained “Turtle Power” is the better song. Turtle Power has the phat beats, the awesome robot voice, and like, an actual inspirational message. Whereas “Ninja Rap” is more pro-Vanilla Ice than it is anything else and has weak-ass rhymes like:

Cause in this life there’s only one winner
You better aim straight so you can hit the center

Besides, there’s only so much GO NINJA GO NINJA GO-ing I can take.

And finally, I’d like to also point out the video for “Turtle Power” is also far superior to the video for “Ninja Rap.” I mean, where else do you get to see Foot Soldiers busting a move and cheerleaders wearing Turtle Power panties? This is how you make a movie tie-in music video, people.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFsTr0kGAqU

What we don’t need to see is four minutes of Vanilla Ice prancing around in slow motion, plus a monologue where he tells us how “ice” he is. YOU’RE VANILLA ICE, WE GET IT! Jesus. And as if this didn’t suck enough, the Turtles are only in this video for a grand total of about 10 seconds.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GFLGRidfFo4

Album Art Porn: Glass Candy - Beatbox
The day I discovered Ninja Sex Party.
The Legend of Zelda + Skrillex = Skrillexquest