A bunch of awesome crap I’d buy from Hake’s if I wasn’t broke!

Hake's Americana and CollectiblesBack in March, my homies and I in The League went on a fantasy shopping spree to Hake’s Americana and Collectibles where I racked up a bill for over $1600 worth of useless but totally awesome crap that I’m certain would look fantastic adorning the walls of Casa de Crafti. It was one of my favorite League assignments to date, so I was pretty happy to see we’re doing it again this week–not only because it’s fun to window shop (hey, I’m great at picking out stuff I can’t afford to buy), but also because it requires practically no writing effort on my part. Win/win!

As a  child of the 80s browsing an auction full of collectibles decades older than myself, it was hard for me to find stuff that really “spoke” to me, as most of it was way before my time (not to mention, there was a disappointing lack of Ninja Turtles this time around).  But buried underneath all the Howdie Doodie, Roy Rogers, World War II memorabilia, and other pop culture stuff I mostly don’t care about, I was able to find a few gems that are much more “me.” And Star Wars. There’s always Star Wars…

Here’s what I bought, or would have bought, if I wasn’t living on hot dogs and baked beans right now:

 

Hakes Auction Collage

And now for the less exciting part where I explain what drew me to these items:

#1 – Set of 4 “Star Wars” Glasses

These Star Wars drinking glasses were sold in Burger King restaurants in 1978, and the set comes with the original cardboard display stand. I love the vivid colors and classic Star Wars imagery. But you know what I love more? Back when Coke was just 59 cents…

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#2 – 1991 “Batman” Statue by Graphitti Designs

It’s Batman perched on a Gargoyle. What’s not to love?  Designed by Dick Giordano and sculpted by Randy Bowen, this gothic Batman statue looks badass and captures the essence of my favorite era of Batman.

Starting Bid Price: $150.00

#3 – Rare “Space Invaders” Arcade Button

Promoting its 1980 arcade release, this mildly suggestive Space Invaders button is not only a rare piece of gaming history but also a badge of honor for nerds everywhere who don’t know what it means to score otherwise.

Starting Bid Price: $65.00

#4 – Eyeball in Hand Pez Dispenser

Of course this psychadelic Pez dispenser came from the 60s, because drugs. Back then you hippies were probably loading more than just Pez into these things. I just think it looks cool.

Starting Bid Price: $155.55

#5 – 1940s & 50s Drug-Themed Paperback Books

Speaking of drugs, these old drug novels caught my eye. Back then, people’s attitudes toward relatively harmless recreational drugs were hilarious (Reefer Madness anyone?), and not just because they apparently have no idea how to spell marijuana.

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#6 – “Midnight Owl” Boxed Transistor Radio

Does this owl look familiar? He’s a replica from the 1981 fantasy film Clash of the Titans! Cooler still, he’s a working transistor radio with jeweled eyes you turn for tuning and volume. With its stop-motion weirdness and crazy Medusa head, That movie used to scare the crap out of me when I was little. But me and the Owl were cool.

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#7 – Life-size “Superman the Movie” Standees

Fresh off seeing Man of Steel in theaters, I’m nostalgic for the 80s Superman movies I grew up with. As much as I enjoyed Henry Cavill’s performance, Christopher Reeves will always be “my” Superman. This lot of life-size Superman standees are 69″ tall and would look great in my future movie theater room. Or laying next to me in bed. Can you give me and Superman some time alone, please?

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#8 – Rare 40″ Tall “Pee Wee Herman” Doll

YES! One of my life goals is to own a Pee Wee Herman doll! Look, I never said I was much of a dreamer. Sadly, this doll isn’t the kind that talks, so I guess I’ll just have to keeping working on my other life goal of perfecting my Pee Wee Herman impression.

Starting Bid Price: $200.00

#9 – Indiana Jones “Raiders of the Lost Ark” Action Figure

With the exception of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, I love all of the Indiana Jones movies and have fond memories of watching them with my Dad. This Indiana Jones action figure from Raiders of the Lost Ark is fully poseable, has “quick draw” whip action, and captures Harrison Ford just the way I like him–young, handsome, and capable of making good movies.

Starting Bid Price: $121.00

#10 – “Snoopy” Moon Landing Button from 1969

The excitement and wonder of the Moon Landing is one of those things I’m jealous older generations got to experience. In stark contrast, my “exciting” space memory is being sent home from school the day the Challenger exploded, trying to understand why all the teachers were crying. (Hey, I was only 5.) I love this Snoopy moon landing button for it’s historic significance and simple innocence.

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#11 – Topps Insult Postcards/Funny Valentines

I really dig the wacky artwork on these Topps Insult Postcards wax packs from the 1960s. If you sent me one of these for Valentine’s Day, I’d have totally gone to first base with you.

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#12 – “The Golden Girls” Cast-Signed Photo

My love for a sitcom about four old ladies living together started because there was nothing else to watch late at night on the shitty TV in my bedroom while growing up, but has since turned genuine. With only 1 out of 4 cast members still alive, it’s only a matter of time before this Golden Girls signed photo skyrockets in value. No pressure, Betty White.

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#13 – “Robot” Battery-Operated Directional Toy

I must have a thing for these retro Japanese robot toys, because I picked out a similar-looking item in the last auction assignment. This one is battery-operated and changes direction whenever he runs into an obstacle.

Starting Bid Price: $500.00

#14 – “E.T. The Extraterrestrial” Metal Lunchbox

Classic Spielberg, and one of my favorite movies of all time. This E.T. tin lunchbox features great, Alvinesque artwork and comes with a matching Thermos.

Starting Bid: $100.00

#15 – “Blinky the One-Eyed Florida Gator” Button

This item is kind of an oddball thing to pick, even for me. I just love the sheer kitschiness of it, and the fact that at some point, back in the 1960s, the people of Florida worshipped a one-eyed alligator. Too bad there’s just a button. I would watch a whole cartoon of this.

Starting Bid Price: $65.00

#16 – “Star Wars” Jewelry Lot

Finally, some Star Wars stuff for girls! This lot of Star Wars jewelry includes three rings and stick pins bearing the likenesses of Darth Vader, 3CPO, and R2D2, as well as a set of six pendants featuring these same characters plus Chewbacca, a Stormtrooper, and an X-wing.

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#17 – Lot of “Blackstar” Carded Action Figures

I have this auction to thank for helping me remember Blackstar, a favorite fantasy cartoon from my childhood I had long forgotten. I almost peed my pants in excitement when I took a closer look at these action figures and realized what they were. A) That cartoon was awesome. B) I had no idea there was an accompanying toyline (but I shouldn’t be surprised, since this is the 80s we’re talking about), and C) I must find a way to re-watch it soon!

Starting Bid Price: $250.00

#18 – Early 1900s Risque Corkscrew

Another oddball item for me. I like weird, fringe stuff like this that reminds me how some things throughout human history never change–Victorian people were horny too! I imagine this corkscrew would have been quite the conversation-starter back then, what with the placement of that screw…well, do you really need me to connect the dots here?

Starting Bid Price: $100.00

#19 – Vincent Price Horror Record Album

I would listen to Vincent Price read from a phone book I love the man’s voice so much, but one of the more entertaining things he’s known for are his narrations of horror stories. This double LP set features The Story of Witchcraft, Demonology and The Occult.

Starting Bid Price: $100

#20 – Franken Berry Cereal Box Flat

Franken Berry isn’t my favorite of the General Mills monster cereals–an honor that belongs to the elusive Yummy Mummy–but he is is the only monster who can lay claim to turning little kids’ poop pink, so that makes him #2 in my book (pun fully intended). This Franken Berry cereal flat is notable for its free Monster Action Ring offer.

Starting Bid Price: $200.00

What’s the damage?

I only had starting bid prices to go on, so the actual total would probably be many hundreds if not thousands higher, but here’s how I did:

Hake's Receipt

I’m kind of proud I spent even more money than last time!

Let’s go shopping!

Wondering what this is all about? This week’s assignment from The League of Extraordinary Bloggers was to go on another fantasy shopping spree at Hake’s Americana and Collectibles. Let’s take a look at what everyone bought!

Happee Tanksgivinz
It's my party and I'll play with Ninja Turtle toys if I want to.
The cool surprises in the mail just keep coming. (I heart UnderScoopFire!)